Friday venting (I had a charley horse in my leg last night, I think this may be the result).

Sorry I have not posted in so long, but it has been a rough month.

Forgive me, but I am about to go to that dark place that I have tried to avoid. Actually, it's not quite that dark, it's maybe a steely charcoal grey. I am a relatively new teacher, so I'm sure many veteran teachers would say, "You don't know what you're talking about... wait twenty years, newbie!" Nevertheless, here is an open letter full of advice for those folks that have decided to pursue the profession of high school teacher (and also for those people who have remained in the profession despite possessing the below characteristics).

Don't go into teaching if you:

1. Are made of marshmallowy fluff with a gooey nougat center, without even the help of a candy cane spine. Kids can be rude, and they do stupid things some times, but you are there to help correct those behaviors. Don't be afraid to tell them that what they are doing is wrong/insensitive/illegal. If they are painting each other, tell them to think about what they are doing... is this a good choice? Probably not. So stop. If they call someone a douchebag, they might hear that at home, so tell them that YOU don't allow that in your classroom. Buck up.

2. Hate kids. They are KIDS. Like I said, they do kid-like things, so be ready to forgive them for it. Help them become adults by not only giving them advice on how to do so, but by being an adult yourself. If there is a student with a chip on their shoulder, there is a reason why. Try to find out and help if possible, or find someone who can.

3. Have no sense of humor. Be ready to laugh at yourself, because no matter how old or smart you are, you will do dumb/clumsy/thoughtless things. And be careful with what you laugh at students about. Be socially aware enough to know when kids are joking, acknowledge it, and move on. They will respect you for understanding their world, but they also don't want you to dwell on their MySpace username.

4. Are unwilling to assume the best about other teachers. If they are young, they may be idealistic, so ride that wave because that's where energy can come from, and don't shoot down every new-fangled idea they may have. If they are nearing retirement, seek their wisdom, because whatever the situation, they have probably seen it and dealt with it. Treat each other as colleagues, not rivals/enemies/idiots. That is, until they prove differently. And some will.

5. Don't want to admit your own faults or shortcomings. Believe me, teaching shows you everything negative about your personality, so be willing to take ownership. Perhaps you may even slowly change those things.

6. Don't keep up on pop culture. Kids are steeped in it, so don't ignore it, because it can be your greatest teaching tool. At the same time, don't let it run your life, because we should be trying to set the example that there is more to life than "America's Next Top Model" and Britney Spears.

7. Are teaching because you don't know what else to do. It's a calling, yo.

That's it so far. I reserve the right to edit/add/make more slashes.